You Found Me
by marysunshine81
Summary: A collection of random McHart one-shots (reposted)
1. A Beer, a Bar and a Lady

Originally posted on: 11/08/2011

_I borrrowed the first line from the TV show 'Wanted' that gave the main idea of this Fic_

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><p><strong>A Beer, a Bar and a Lady<strong>

"Nothing is sexier than a woman drinking beer out of a bottle," he leaned closer to her to whisper into her ear after she took the first sip.

Her lips curled up to a smile then the smile turned into a chuckle and the chuckle ended in laughter. No one could laugh the way she did. That was one of the many reasons he'd fallen in love with her. And tonight he added a bunch of more to the list of reasons why he loved her. She was sitting next to him in a bar, wearing jeans and a shirt just like him, drinking beer from a bottle just like him. Her hair was held up in a ponytail and definitely no one around them could have guessed her age or her profession when looking at her that night.

"I had to dress like you so that you finally tell me I'm sexy?" she asked in a teasing tone and this time he was the one who couldn't stop his laughter from bursting out.

"I'm sure it wasn't the first time you heard this from me," he apologized, while his mind was already racing to try and think of another time he'd said those words.

"I'm pretty sure it was," she stated firmly and took another sip of the drink.

He couldn't think of anything to confute her statement with, so he decided to make his mistake right then and there.

"_You are sexy_," he whispered in her ear slowly, emphasising each word, "And I can repeat this after every sip, before every kiss, whatever you want," he added, moving a little backwards, trying to look into her eyes.

"Whatever I want?" she asked sending a rather seductive look in his direction and he couldn't resist leaning towards her ear to slowly whisper the three words again.

She started to chuckle elegantly, the way only she could, but he immediately cut her off with a kiss on her lips. She didn't protest, she let his lips take over hers, giving in to him completely. He didn't want to seem too eager, it wasn't the right place for that, but he wanted to show her that he meant what he'd said.

After their lips parted she moved hers to his ear, "Just for the record, _you are sexy too_," she whispered in the same tone as he had.

"You know, it's not like you've ever told me this before either," he replied with a challenging smile and she hid hers behind the bottle, drinking from it again.

"It's the beer," she stated casually, "Makes me wanna say all sorts of things," she leaned to his side again to finish the sentence, "And do," she placed a kiss on his cheek before she moved back again.

"You should drink beer more often," he shrugged, tasting his drink again.

"Nah, it's a one of a lifetime opportunity cowboy, you should use it wisely," she challenged him and it was no use denying how much she'd turned him on with her behaviour. Still leaving the place at once to bring her home and make love to her wouldn't have fallen under the 'wisely' category and they both knew that. He was probably facing the most unguarded Diane Lockhart he'd ever seen, so he planned to enjoy her company as long as possible.

"Let's dance," he suggested out of the blue, clearly surprising her with his words.

"What?" she asked incredulously, "I thought you can't dance."

"And I thought you don't like beer, go figure," he said teasing and it was obvious that she considered this a fair reply, because she gave him a remarkable smile.

"I don't like beer, but you've never said you liked dancing either," she retorted neatly and he let out a slight chuckle.

Arguing with her had almost been impossible for him, because no matter how hard he'd tried she'd always had to have the last word. And he had never really minded, because he had been in love with her smartness from the first moment on. He would never forget the first time when he'd shown her the experiment in his lab connected to the first case they'd ever worked on together. She'd grasped everything so easily, he hadn't had to explain much to her. Some men would feel intimidated by smart women, but not him. He'd always been smart enough to respect that in the other sex.

"Let's find it out if I do," he suggested and he had no doubts she'd say yes.

It was the first time he'd ever talked about dancing with her, even though they'd had the chance to do it on several occasion. But he'd never been sure what she'd say to him asking her out, she had never been comfortable putting their relationship on a public display. He'd been with her to different events, but mostly as a discreet plus one and they never really went further than linking arms.

But tonight was different. They were in a bar and he suspected that it'd been a long time since she'd been in a place like that before. She was basically at an unusual place, drinking something she wasn't used to drinking, wearing clothes he'd never thought to see her in one day. Everything was out of _her_ ordinary that night and he decided it was time for them to break more of her rules.

Without waiting for her reply he grabbed her hand that wasn't holding the bottle and she didn't hesitate long. She put the drink on the table and stood up from her seat, following him to the dance floor. They both looked at the couples dancing around them, trying to figure out how to adapt to them. They were of different ages, so they fitted in perfectly, even though the rhythm of the song that was playing was apparently as unfamiliar to her as to him. Still he didn't hesitate long to finally grab a hold of her and their moves soon adjusted to the music as they danced along.

"I might not like dancing in general, but I definitely love dancing with you," he whispered to her ear and he felt as she slicked just a little closer to him as they were moving to the slow tunes of the next song.

"I thought it was something for me to find out," she smiled, obviously flattered by his statement.

"I'm sure you have already figured it out," he replied, holding her just a little tighter.

"Maybe," she shrugged, "I mean you give yourself away too easily," she teased, but he knew that she was right, in fact she liked that about him. He showed what he felt and meant what he said.

"What you see is what you get," he smiled then bent closer to her ear again, "You know I can't control myself around you," he whispered.

"It was your choice, cowboy," she breathed into his ear and at that point he almost regretted choosing dancing over something completely different that night.

Even though she was wearing a simple shirt, she made sure to leave enough buttons open at the top to draw the attention of his eyes there from time to time. Not to mention the smell of her perfume, the one he really loved and always reminded him of her. She was as womanly in her unusual outfit as ever. He turned in her direction to captivate her eyes for a short while then leaned to her ear to whisper those magical words.

"You are sexy."

This time she didn't chuckle, she waited patently until his lips found their way to hers. For a moment he forgot about where they were and how many people were around them. He tasted her lips with an impatient desire and her former patience seemed to have vanished as well. By the time their kiss ended they were both nearly grasping for air and he realised that it was no use fighting the obvious anymore. It was finally time for them to get out of there.

"I want to kidnap you from here," he said, meaning every word and he saw in her eyes that she was also ready for that. He had no doubts that she wanted the same thing as him.

"You won't even let me finish my beer?"

The teasing question came on her lips and this opportunity was too good for him to pass.

"If I let you finish your beer, I'm afraid it might have serious consequences."

There was no use denying what he had in mind, he had already given himself away anyway. Still it was almost fun to say these words, even though the way he felt at that moment was everything but funny.

"And I wouldn't want that, would I?"

She continued with the teasing and he just had to put an end to it, because seeing her smiling face, her red cheeks and lips started to get too much of a temptation.

"The question is _where _you want that?"

He made it clear finally, making sure no one heard him but her, even though the music was loud enough to keep their conversation safe from stranger ears. She didn't look stunned hearing his words, in fact she seemed to like where this conversation was going, she enjoyed teasing him up to a certain point and he knew after his last statement she would change her tone as well.

"You know that the answer is everywhere," she whispered in his ear then placed a kiss on his lips, before moving hers back to his side, "I want you_ everywhere_, but I know I can't have you _anywhere_, so let's go _somewhere_."

There was something funny about how she emphasised on the three similar, but still very different words, but he didn't think of laughing at her statement at all. She was willing to go with him and he was willing to take her away.

"_Somewhere_ it is," he replied and his lips approached hers again, but before kissing them he raised his eyes to look into hers and it gave him strength to resist the temptation.

She seemed more than willing to give in to anything he initiated that night, so he had to try not to lose control completely for the sake of them both. He knew she might regret things the other day and he didn't want her to regret giving in to him ever. One of his arms let go off her waist and still holding her with the other he took a small step backwards, pulling her softly with him. She slipped one hand from his shoulder down on his back then took the other off him and followed his steps.

They quickly reached his car and got in, without spending any more time fanning the flames. They would burst out on their own as soon as they get to that safe place. A place where they could be alone, where they could show each other how they felt, where they could love each other without regrets. Somewhere he wished to hide with her each night, for the rest of their lives.


	2. All Mine

_Originally posted on: 08/24/2011**  
><strong>_

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><p><strong>All mine<strong>

He knew he shouldn't have let her take that call. It had come at the worst possible moment. She'd been done with work for that night, she was supposed to be all his again. He was already holding her in his arms, kissing her lips, when her cell phone started to ring. He asked her, he begged her not to take the call, but she insisted on doing so. A call at such an hour on a Sunday evening could have never meant anything good. He also knew that she had to take it, still a part of him wished those calls could wait, or didn't come at all. And just once in a while he wanted to be more important than any call.

He could even have considered himself lucky this time, because she didn't have to leave, she just had to write a draft for a last minute meeting for the next morning. She told him she only needed an hour and even though he knew it would be the longest hour of his life he couldn't say no. He let her do her work, but couldn't think of anything to spend his time with for that period. He'd planned only one thing for that night, _she _was his plan.

It had been a cold winter day, and he knew how she loved spending time at the fireplace, watching the flames vibrate in the dark night. It was the most romantic evening he could think of and it should have ended in a completely different way, but soon after they'd gotten lost in each other's arms they were interrupted by the phone.

It's been a half an hour, and he literally counted all ticks of the clock on the wall. It's been exactly 1800 ticks so far and he still couldn't figure out what else he could have spent his time with while waiting. He didn't look at her all the time, he held a book in his hand just for cover up, but he hadn't read a single line and from the corner of his eyes he had been watching her. She never looked up, she was thinking and writing and thinking again. She was simply too adorable for words. He was surprised she'd even let him stay in the same room while she had been working. But he'd made fire for them, he didn't make a fuss about the call, she might have thought this was the least he deserved. Had she known he hadn't really been reading, but observing her all the time, she might have thought differently.

Ten more minutes passed by the same way, 600 seconds, and he was still counting, but he started to loose his patience. Even in a T-shirt and a simple pair of pants, without make up and her hair held up with hairgrips she was beautiful to him. Her co-workers, her clients wouldn't have recognized her that way, but this had become her most familiar look to him. Of course he loved seeing her elegant, in her short skirts and high heels, how could he not love seeing her that way? But there was something about this cosy Diane that made him feel as if they were even closer.

After 45 minutes, 2700 seconds he couldn't help himself any longer.

"Are you done yet?"

"Huh?" she asked after exactly 30 seconds. He knew it, because he kept on counting.

"I asked if you are ready yet."

She looked up, but instead of looking at him, she looked at the clock on the wall.

"I have 14 minutes and 15 seconds left," she stated looking in his direction for a moment then her gaze fell on her notepad again.

"I just thought you might end it a little earlier than you'd planned."

"No," she replied without looking up again.

"Because what you can do in an hour you can do in 45 minutes too, it doesn't make much of a difference you know."

She looked up, obviously smiling and took off her glasses for a moment.

"You know, you've just wasted," she looked at the clock again "1 minute and 25 seconds of my hour with all this talk, which means I'll actually finish later than I'd thought. And it will be _your fault_," she put her glasses back on and immediately started writing again.

"Should I call your cell and tell you I'm in trouble and need my lawyer with me right away? Cause I'd gladly do it, just to finally make you stop concentrating on that paper."

"Nice try," she said smiling, without stopping writing, "But I still have 14 minutes."

"14?" he asked looking at the clock, because he lost track of time talking to her, "You only have 11."

"No," she said playfully, taking off her glasses again for a moment, "You see, I had 14 minutes and 15 seconds when you started with all this, so you should be happy that I don't insist on the extra 15 seconds, because all that time we've been talking has just been a waste. Now if you'd let me concentrate on this again for another 14 minutes, I'd appreciate it," she said and just looked at him without moving her eyes away.

"Fine," he said after 10 seconds, which earned him another smile, before she put on her glasses again, ready for work.

He managed to keep quiet for another 600 seconds, when the original 60 minutes were supposed to be over, but after that time his patience completely vanished. He put down the book, and sat closer to her on the couch. The minute she felt him close to her she looked in his direction.

"What are you doing? I still have 3 minutes and 40 seconds," she said taking a quick look at the clock.

"I know," he said placing a kiss on her neck.

"Kurt, I need those 3 minutes and 40 seconds," she tried to move away from him just a little.

"You've had 57 minutes, no actually you've had 61 minutes already. You're done," he kissed her neck again.

"No, I'm not. I still have 3 minutes and 40 seconds and I will continue having 3 minutes and 40 seconds until you stop doing what you're doing."

"What am I doing?" he asked in an innocent voice and kissed her neck over and over again. She could have stood up, but the fact that she stayed sitting there, letting him do what he was doing and only telling him to stop didn't convince him that he should indeed stop.

"I need to finish this."

"No you don't. You haven't written anything in the last 1 minute and 40 seconds."

"Maybe because you make it impossible for me to…"

"I'm just kissing your neck, I'm harmless, go on…if you have to," he touched her hair and took off one of the hairgrips, letting a part of her blonde hair fall on her shoulders.

"Harmless, huh?" she gave him an eye roll and as if nothing had happened she continued writing.

He took off all her hairgrips one by one, and kissed her neck each time he was finished with one, while she continued writing and the clock continued ticking. In each of the last 60 seconds he gave her a small kiss on her neck and he had no idea how she managed to still concentrate on work when he was already about to lose his mind. This wait had seemed like an eternity after all.

When the clock struck the last second he reached for her glasses without a word and took them off and this time she didn't protest. He placed her glasses on the table in front of them where he'd placed all her hairclips before and she did the same with her notes and the pen.

At this point he simply couldn't take his eyes off her lips, that still said no word, but she did something he hadn't expected her to do, she stood up. But before he could ask anything she took one of his hands and pulled him with her as she passed the table nearing the fireplace.

When they were close enough that the crackling sound of the wood on fire suppressed the ticking of the clock, she let go off his hand. She kissed him on the lips gently, as a thank you for his patience and then placed her pointing finger on his lips.

"Just one more second," she said then turned away from him and stepped back to the table.

He wanted to reach out for her, but she was quicker and before he could say anything he noticed what she was doing and didn't need words any more. The beeping sound of her cell phone answered his unvoiced question and he pulled her into his arms the minute he could reach her again.

She had made sure no more phone calls could interrupt them that night and with each of his kisses he showed her how grateful he was that she was finally all his again.


	3. Teasing

_Originally posted on 09/23/2011_

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><p><strong>Teasing<strong>

She knew it was impolite not to look at her guest, but whenever she lifted her eyes to look at her, they ended up focusing on someone else, who was a few meters behind the woman, outside the closed glass doors, sitting in a position that made it impossible for her not to look at him. She had to remember the first time this exact same thing had happened, she had been giving an interview in her office when he had arrived and sat down in the exact same position, teasing her with his eyes, with his tight jeans, with his body language.

Why hadn't she told him to wait for her outside, somewhere she wouldn't have been able to see him, because seeing him like this was just unbearable. She couldn't concentrate on what her guest had to say, she couldn't reply to her, she was unable to do anything but either look at him or force herself not to look at him, but even then her thoughts were still focusing on him.

He had come to pick her up, she'd told him she would have been done by then, but she wasn't. They had plans to dine out that night, but suddenly dining out didn't seem like the best idea to her. If she was only allowed to stare at him even during dinner, she was sure it would kill her. This man was hers, she had the right to do more than just stare at him, but for that they needed to be alone, she needed to get rid of the client and make him not drive her into that restaurant but to a place where they could finally be alone, where she could do more than just look at him.

She had no idea what the woman in front of her was talking about and she didn't care any more. She tried to catch his eyes again and raised her right hand to her ears, stretching out her thumb and her little finger, to send a message to him. And smart as he was he got the message right away. He reached into his pocket and took out his cell phone and the next moment Diane's phone started to ring.

"Excuse me," she said quickly and answered her phone, "Yes?"

"Hey, do you need help or something?" his voice sounded even more teasing than his look.

"What? Do you say it's an emergency?"

"Me dying to kiss you sounds exactly like an emergency to me," he replied and she had to try hard not to chuckle hearing his words.

"Of course I can be there in twenty minutes, I'll just have to postpone my meeting."

"Twenty minutes? Are you freaking kidding me? I can't wait that long," he replied in the same teasing voice and all she could do was roll her eyes hearing his words, even though she was sure he got the message all the same.

"I'll be on my way soon," she finally said and hung up.

She turned to the other woman again with her best poker face.

"I'm sorry Mrs. Thomas, we have to postpone this meeting. I have to rush to the police station right away."

The other woman was looking at her with confusion on her face.

"My assistant will call you tomorrow to schedule a new appointment."

"All right, thank you Miss Lockhart," she finally said and stood up, "Good bye."

"Good bye," Diane replied and watched the woman leave, but her eyes were already searching for his eyes again.

He was actually smiling now, with a teasing smile and she could finally smile back at him with an almost clear conscience. She let a possible client go after all without finishing up their meeting, but it was completely his fault. He should have waited in the car. She walked towards the door and stopped in the doorway. She looked in the direction of the corridor, where the client left, it was empty already. Will's office was empty too, he'd left a half an hour ago, just like their assistants. They were alone.

He was still sitting there like before, he didn't move, but he didn't take his eyes off her either. She looked around again, then took a step in his direction, which made him change his position by putting his leg that had been resting on the other back on the ground again. He didn't stand up and she hesitated for a moment, when he reached out his hands towards her and pulled her into his lap for a kiss.

She didn't protest and while the kiss lasted she managed to forget about where they were in that moment, but right after their lips parted her gaze fell on the desk of the assistants and she knew they had to get out of their as soon as they could.

"You should have waited in the car," she said, placing a small kiss on his lips again and he chuckled.

She stood up and pulled him with her.

"Let's get out of here," she said and he nodded.

She let go off him for a moment and quickly stepped back to her office to grab her purse, thinking he would wait for her outside, but instead she heard his steps behind her. She turned around to face him.

"I'm just grabbing my purse."

He stepped closer to her with a smile on his face and she froze as she looked into his eyes. This man was the temptation himself and she couldn't fight against him, not when he was looking at her like that. Whatever he wanted at that moment she knew she would give it to him. He took another step towards her and he could have reached her if he had wanted to, but he just stared at her leaving the decision to her. Her eyes wandered around, looking out the glass windows of the office in each direction. The corridors were still empty, so she decided she had nothing to lose, she could kiss him once more right there.

She folded her arms around his neck and pulled him closer to her for a kiss. And apparently he only needed this to get eager to kiss her back, to fold his arms around her and push her towards her desk. She could have regretted to make this move, but she couldn't regret anything, because his lips made it impossible for her to do so. Not to mention his arms touching her body, burning it even through the fabric of her jacket.

"Let's go," she whispered against his lips as soon as she could tear herself a few inches away from him.

He let go off her and stepped back one step. She grabbed her purse from the cabinet, while he was still standing in the same position. She passed by him in the direction of the door and his steps followed hers.

The corridors were deserted as they started walking in the direction of the elevators, but she still resisted the urge to touch him again, she had to wait until they would finally be alone. Suddenly having the office on the 28th floor was a comforting feeling, because she was determined to make a good use of that time they would spend in the elevator, however short that might be.

Even with the doors closed he seemed to behave like a perfect gentleman, as if he wanted to assure her that since it was her office, they played by her rules. Not that she felt like having any say in what was happening to her, she'd lost all her self-control during those long minutes when she'd been watching him sitting right in front of her with the most teasing look ever on his face. It was his fault, no way it could have been her fault that she pulled him closer to her and kissed him even more passionately than before. And again her move authorised him to lose control, he pushed her to the wall and she didn't even mind. Kissing him was all that mattered at that moment.

As the elevator reached the ground their lips parted and he stepped back, leaving space for her to pass by him. They entered the garage and she looked around once more to see if anyone was nearby. They seemed to have luck that day, as if the whole world had hidden from them to let them do things they might regret some day. In fact she knew she would regret it the next day when she would step into that elevator again and he wouldn't be there to push her to the wall. When she would step into her office and he wouldn't be behind her to follow. Or when she would sit in another meeting, staring at the empty armchair in front of her in the hall, wishing he was sitting there, distracting her.

As they reached his car he opened the door for her on the side of the passenger seat, but before she could get in he pushed her to the side of the car and kissed her passionately. She knew this was getting dangerous and she started to think of how soon they could actually be at home once they managed to finally get into that car. She couldn't think of an exact amount of time, but she was pretty sure it wasn't soon enough.

"I'll drive," she said as their lips parted and he reached into his pocket without a word and gave her the keys.

She kissed him shortly then he let her go to the other side of the car, while he got in the passenger seat. Right after she got in beside him she closed the door and started the engine. She suddenly felt his hand touching her thigh softly and she turned her head in his direction just a little silently trying to indicate to him to stop teasing her just a little. He pulled back his hand the next moment, understanding her request.

When they reached the exit she didn't turn in the direction she was supposed to, she turned in the opposite direction, but he didn't say a word. Five minutes later she parked the car in front of a building that was all too familiar to both of them. And at that moment she didn't associate it with the humiliation she had had to endure in court two days after their first date. Right then it was nothing else but a safe place for them, where they would finally have the chance to be alone, behind closed doors. Where she wouldn't have to look out for strangers eyes and could do what she wanted to him with a clear conscience.

She didn't have to say anything for him to know why she decided to drove them there and after they'd entered the building she sat down in an armchair in a corner, while he went over to the reception. She looked around again and the hall was in fact empty there as well. She found it amusing actually and let out a small chuckle. She had to chuckle at how ridiculous this whole situation was, that they sneaked into a hotel instead of going home like a normal couple.

Not that they were anything like a normal couple. They had completely different wardrobes, living quarters, political values, but when it came to passion or love these simply didn't matter. All she needed was one look, one touch, one kiss to forget about what separated them and surrender to him completely.

They stepped into the elevator again, but this time nothing happened. She knew that the yearning would be over very soon, she didn't mind waiting just a little longer and he silently agreed. But the minute the door of the room closed behind them there were no stop signs any more. Undressing each other didn't last longer than a moment for them and as they finally lay on the bed in each other's arms she didn't mind giving in to his teasing eyes, because he was exactly what she needed.


	4. Merry Christmas!

_Originally posted on 12/20/2011_

_Timeline: Christmas after 2x15_

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><p><strong>Merry Christmas!<strong>

She reached her desk and easily found the piece of paper she'd come for, when she heard a slight knock on the wooden door. She turned around quickly just to startle at the sight of him.

"Merry Christmas," said the familiar voice and for a moment Diane just stared at him as if he was a ghost in his impeccable suit and checkered shirt. The last time she'd seen him, he'd been standing almost on the same spot, in a similar suit and even though it had happened almost a year ago the memories started to come back to her at once. The way he'd told her he had to go, the way she'd kissed him goodbye, the way he'd said "Palin 2012". It would have been nice to start with teasing him that his hope was gone, but somehow their usual bantering about politics didn't seem like a good subject to begin with. She was much more interested in why he was there.

"What are you doing here?" she asked trying to find her presence, get her act back together, holding onto the piece of paper she'd lifted from the desk just a minute ago.

"I followed you," he replied with a grin and stepped inside the room.

Her first reaction was to step backwards as he got closer to her, but she couldn't do it, the table was right behind her, so she just tried to look casual. His presence might have unsettled her a little, but it'd been long enough since the last time, the wounds had heeled and she hadn't even really thought of him lately. She had in fact closed that chapter already and she didn't really understand why he insisted on opening it again.

Of course she remembered having seen his name on the guest list for the office Christmas Party. The list had had several clients of the firm whose cases they'd dealt with that year. As usual she had had the task to collect who should have been invited to their annual Christmas Party. Inviting him had seemed like a good idea back then, she'd meant it as a gesture, hadn't really given it too much thought and certainly hadn't expected him to actually come.

"I mean I didn't expect to see you here tonight," she said the words out loud, trying not to sound hurtful towards him.

"I know, but I was in town and saw the invitation and…I missed you," he finished the sentence in the most unexpected way and that was the moment she started to regret inviting him.

"I…I…," she just couldn't find the right words to say, then she lowered her gaze and it fell on the paper in her hand, which saved her from the difficult situation, "I came to fetch my speech for the opening. Can we continue this later maybe?" she asked, because postponing the conversation seemed to be the best idea at that moment, besides the party was already waiting for her to hear her opening speech.

"Sure, I'll be around," he said turning towards the door again.

She knew she should have reacted differently hearing his confession, but the truth was that she didn't know how to react. She needed time to think it through, to figure out how to handle this situation, what to reply to him. She wasn't even sure if she had missed him as well, because she hadn't allowed herself to even think of him. It had been easier to just banish the memories from her mind.

"Kurt," she called out his name after he took the first step outside and he turned back to her with a calm look on his face, "Merry Christmas."

o-o-o

"Would you like some eggnog?" she asked, taking a seat next to him.

"Nah, those are for women," he replied, lifting his beer bottle with a short smile.

She smiled back at him and tasted the drink in her hand, lying back in her seat. She still couldn't figure out what to say to him exactly concerning his previous statement, but she somehow felt calmer in his company than before. Maybe it was the alcohol kicking in or she was just more prepared now than she had been when she had first seen him that night.

"I love these parties, just looking at what the alcohol can do to people who usually are so moderate in my presence," she decided to stay on the safe side with the small talk.

"They surely don't suspect that you are keeping tabs," he replied slightly chuckling and she took it as a good sign.

"Only until I get drunk myself and forget about what I had seen," she chuckled along and the feeling of comfort started to spread inside of her.

She had no reason to feel tensed in his company, they had parted on friendly terms back then and even though it had been painful for her at first, she had understood why he'd chosen to go and leave her behind. She just hadn't expected him to come back anymore.

"I'm sorry for putting you in such an inconvenient situation, I should have probably called first before barging in."

"I've invited you," she replied, looking into his eyes, not allowing him to take the blame on his own, "I should have counted with the possibility that you actually show up," she presented him with a smile that meant that she was actually happy about seeing him there, but she decided to say it out loud as well, just in case, "It's good to see you again."

She made her decision. She decided not to close any doors too quickly, not before she heard him out. He had already admitted that he'd missed her, maybe he had more things to say to her. And if not they could still spend this evening together, if only for old time's sake. Most of the people had come with dates to the party, at least now she had someone on her side as well. She had no obligation towards anyone else, so she didn't see any harm in spending time with someone she once truly cared for.

"You too," he replied and lifted his bottle again to softly clink it against her glass.

o-o-o

"I had no idea you have such a wonderful singing voice," he greeted her with admirations after she'd given a small performance that had already kind of become a Christmas tradition.

"It's just the beer talking from you," she chuckled, not taking his comment seriously.

"No and since I generally am not a real fan of music and singing you can trust me if I say that this was very enjoyable," he grinned, but she was still convinced that if he did actually like her performance it wasn't because he had ears for singing, definitely not in the state he was in.

He'd gotten a little too much to drink that night, while she kind of held herself back. Maybe it was due to the fact that he was there and she didn't want to lose her self-control too much in his company. She wanted to handle this situation like an adult, while he started to act more like a child. Of course she knew she had no right to tell him to stop drinking, even though she started to fear that his behavior might get out of his control soon enough.

"What do you say if we leave now?" she asked, fearing his reply that he might actually say no.

She had no more responsibilities for the night and since getting drunk was not an option for her anymore she figured it would be best to leave the others behind to enjoy themselves without the presence of her observant eyes. Not to mention that Kurt's sudden odd attitude started to worry her. She had never seen him drunk before and she started to feel that he was in fact her responsibility for that night. She had to make sure he would get home in one piece and considering how far his home was and what kind of weather they had outside she soon realize that the only home she could actually take him to was hers.

o-o-o

"I've kind of ruined your evening, haven't I?" he asked, his eyes almost half closed already as he lay down on her couch.

"No you haven't," she replied after a short pause. He only ruined her opportunity of getting drunk in front of her coworkers and she really had no reason to be sore at him for that.

"Maybe I shouldn't have drunk that scotch on the first place, but it really wasn't that easy to show up in front of you after what happened," he continued and even though his drunken honesty and talkativeness made her smile, she also understood that it must have been hard for him indeed. Not to mention this kind of explained why he opened with the "I missed you" line. Not that she doubted that he had been honest and seeing him laying on her couch she had to finally admit to herself that she had also missed him.

"You will sleep it off," she replied, but she only received a quiet mumble from him in return, before he started to snore.

She searched for a blanket to cover him with then went to the kitchen and opened a bottle of white wine for herself. With the glass in one hand and the bottle in the other she went back to her living room and sat in the armchair, facing him.

For the next hour she was just sipping her wine, watching him sleep. It was Christmas Day already and for the first time in years she wasn't alone. And even without knowing what the next morning would bring she was convinced that it was going to be a Merry Christmas.


	5. The Way You Look Tonight

_Originally posted on 10/15/2011_

_I borrowed the dress from Zac Posen, I couldn't resist_**  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>The way you look tonight<strong>

He enters the room and quickly looks around, searching for her with his eyes, but he doesn't see her anywhere in the crowd. He looks at his watch to realise he is a half an hour late, but he couldn't get there earlier. He knows she might get angry with him for this, but he also knows how to blow her anger away. Of course that can only happen after they leave this place where they are watched with hundreds of curious eyes. As long as they are inside this room she will have to pretend they are fine even if she wants to rag him for being late. Not that she'd often do that, but she insists on punctuality just a little too much to simply overlook that long of a delay.

"Good evening ladies and gentleman," the words interrupt his line of thoughts and he looks in the direction of the voice, spotting the woman on the stage, standing in front of the microphone, smiling confidently and looking beyond gorgeous. He tries to actually listen to what she says, but the rest of her speech just fades in his mind, because he's unable to concentrate on anything else but how she looks that night.

The tight dark blue dress reveals her perfect figure and even though he loves seeing her in colours like red and purple, this dark coloured outfit just takes his breath away. Besides the favourable cut of the dress the part that holds his full attention is the neckline. He's in fact wondering how come she decided to wear such a bold dress in front of all these people, even though he's perfectly aware that the only person who is allowed to really admire her that night is him.

His eyes don't leave her, not for one second and even though there are a lot of people in that room he manages to capture her eyes for a short while. Her lips curl up in a quick smile and he is sure to be the only one who notices and understands that sign. It means that she's in fact happy to see him there and also likes what she sees. He knows he looks his best that night as well, not that he actually likes the tux he is wearing, but judging from the look on her face she does. He tries to avoid dressing up like this whenever he can, but tonight he had to take an effort, even though it just added to his delay. But she insisted on him looking like this that night and if he is honest with himself there's nothing he wouldn't do for her.

The sound of clapping is the next thing he hears, but he is too captivated to do it himself. As she turns around to leave the stage all he can think of is the moment she will be next to him and how he's going to suppress the urge to take her into his arms right away. Admiring her, he firmly believes he's the luckiest man in that room. He doesn't have to look around to check out other women to be a hundred percent sure that the most beautiful one in there belongs to him.

He is aware that he should walk up to her, but his feet seem too heavy to move. He makes eye contact with her once again and she starts walking in his direction, followed by several eyes, but she only seems to care about one pair of eyes. When someone stops her on her way he feels anger running through his veins and wants to force himself to move forward and steal her from other's company. But his anger vanishes as soon as she is on her way again and he in fact manages to take a few steps himself to finally meet her just a little bit earlier.

He knows there are not so many things they can actually do with all these people watching. She has strict rules when it comes to showing affection in public and he respects those rules. But only looking at her seems unacceptable for him that night, he actually wants to widen those rules just a little, just this once. He will only do it with her permission of course so he plans to pay attention to every small sign she's going to give to him with her eyes, with her body language.

Linking arms with him is the first thing she does when she gets close and there's something reassuring in this move. He almost believes he's lucky enough not to get lectured on punctuality this time, when she leans close to him to whisper something in his ear.

"Don't think that just because you're the most handsome man in this room I won't punish you for arriving late."

The closeness of her lips to his ear makes it almost impossible for him to take her words seriously. He's sure that any kind of punishment from her could not be worse than this withheld desire that he's been suffering from ever since he set eyes on her that night. He leans close to her and whispers in her ear the same way she did.

"I have to admit that you've already made me forgive all your sins tonight."

She chuckles hearing his words and he just finds the sound of her laughter too irresistible. He moves his lips towards her ear again, but before reaching it he guardedly places a small kiss on her cheek in the hope that she won't mind it too much.

"Is there anyway we can escape from here right now?"

Her lips curl up to a smile and for a short moment he dares to expect her to say yes, even though he's perfectly aware that the answer can only be no, not yet.

"I don't think so," she replies, waving with her other hand, but he doesn't really care about who she's greeting that way. He's almost managed to forget about the room full of people around them, ever since she arrived on his side. He can't help but look disappointed, partly faking it a little, because he knows that they can't just leave whenever he wants. And he's surprised when his partly faked disappointment earns him a small kiss on his cheek.

"We have to stay and play nice with these people for at least another hour or two, just consider it as your punishment for arriving late."

He knows it's not exactly a punishment, because they would have been forced to stay there even if he had arrived in time. But if she thinks he can redeem his offence with this he would be a fool to say no.

"So how long exactly? One hour or two?"

"You know for someone who arrives a half an hour late to an event where his girlfriend delivers a speech, you're rather shameless."

This time he has to chuckle and admit that he's underestimated her, she won't just forgive this delay that easily after all.

"I was here before your speech started," is all the defence he can come up with at that moment and he hopes she won't actually ask her about the content of the speech, he doesn't want to give himself away fully.

"And that is your luck cowboy, had you missed it, you wouldn't want to be anywhere near me right now."

He knows she is not kidding, still he finds her amusing and in fact even more desirable.

"I don't want to be anywhere but near you right now," he whispers passionately, breaking their teasing and he actually has to fight against his rising desire.

"Two hours tops, I promise," she says switching to a serious tone and gives him a small kiss on his mouth. He appreciates this gesture as much as he should and takes it as a sign that his sins are also forgiven.

o-o-o-o

Only five minutes have passed since the last time he checked his watch under the table. He's been trying to do it unobtrusively, so he is actually surprised when he suddenly feels her hand land on his. He glances in her direction, but she's not looking at him, she's still engaged in a conversation with the other people at their table, keeping one of her hands firmly on his wrist, covering his watch, obviously on purpose.

It hasn't been two hours yet, but he has become more and more impatient. It's getting harder to hide his boredom from the others, to pretend he feels comfortable in his tux and he doesn't dare to look at the woman on his side anymore, because he is already tired of just looking at her. The deep cut of her dress teases him, the smell of her perfume drives him crazy and the sound of her laughter makes him jealous, because he's laughing with others.

He's been checking the time so often, because he doesn't intend to stay there any longer than the obligatory two hours she promised him not to exceed, but she's even taken this opportunity away from him. He's close to leaning towards her to whisper his displeasure in her ear when suddenly her hand moves away from his wrist, then gently turns his hand on the other side. Touching his palm this time she places her fingers between his and all this without one single glance in his direction. He doesn't look on their hands either and doesn't show any sign of emotion, but he's already smiling inside.

He's unable to look at the time anymore, but holding her hand in his reassures him that she'll keep her promise, that they'll leave in time and once they are alone he won't have a reason to feel bored, jealous or uncomfortable. He leans back in his seat and starts to actually listen to the conversation and looking at her doesn't feel like a torture anymore. It feels like a promise that the gorgeous woman on his side will shortly be only his.

"I'm afraid we have to go now," he hears her words a few minutes later and even though he's been waiting for this moment for too long, he doesn't jump from his seat, he stays there, holding her hand. She is the one who breaks their hidden harmony first, pulling back her hand from his and she stands up from the table. The next minute he does the same and after saying goodbye to the others he follows her out of the room.

It's not cold outside, but he takes off his jacket and puts it on her just in case and refuses to take back his hand from her shoulder afterwards. She doesn't seem to mind, they have been moderate in the last almost two hours, but they don't need to be that way anymore. He's sure he could finally kiss her now if he wanted to, but his impatience seems to have vanished without trace. He leads her to his car, helps her in and closes the door on her side without attempting any more intimacy between them.

After he gets in himself he wants to start the engine, but something tells him not to do it yet. He turns his head in her direction and looks at her for a short while. She seems different now than she was inside the room, she was shining all night and now it feels as if the light faded away. It confuses him a little, but then it hits him that she might be waiting for something. He's held himself back because he didn't want to seem eager, but it might have given her the wrong impression after all.

He leans forward to kiss her as gently as he can, as if he tasted her lips for the very first time. It's not a kiss of passion, it's a kiss of love and he feels the same emotion coming from her. After their lips part he looks into her eyes which are shining again, but this time only for him. He takes her hand in his, lifts it to his mouth, placing a kiss on it and she presents him with a smile in return.

"Take me home," she says and leans back in her seat after he lets go off her hand and he fulfils their mutual wish happily.

o-o-o-o

He walks inside the living room following her and as she stops by the couch he steps closer to her and takes his jacket off her shoulder. He places it on the sofa, then stands close behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist, resting his head on her shoulder.

"I think we made a really nice couple tonight," he whispers into her ear and her lips curl up in a smile.

"I actually had a feeling all women in the room envied me," she says turning her head in his direction a little.

"And I had the same feeling about all men," he admits, placing a kiss on her cheek.

"Nah," she replies turning her head away from him again and bowing it down a little. He looks closely at the side of her face and he believes to see her blush a little. It's hard to imagine her doing that, especially because she always seems so self-confident, but for some reason that night she is different. Most likely it's just an act, but he doesn't mind playing along. If she needs him to tell her how beautiful she looks again and again, he will.

"Are you telling me you don't get how gorgeous you look in this dress?" he asks, emphasizing on the word and she smiles just a little.

"You just want to flatter me," she replies after a short pause, looking into his eyes again and he finds it just adorable how she acts up on seeming insecure. He starts to really enjoy this little scene and suddenly an idea comes to his mind.

"Come with me," he takes back his arms from around her and reaching for her hand he pulls her with himself in the direction of the staircase. He's almost ready to take her in his arms and bring her up himself, but he decides against it. He lets go off her hand and climbs the stairs motioning her to follow him. He leads her into the bedroom, turns on the light, walks up to her closet and opens it.

"Come here," he asks reaching out his hand in her direction and she obeys him without a word.

"Look at yourself," he says as they both stand in front of her huge mirror and he can't take his eyes off her face in front of him, "This dress simply looks perfect on you."

He observes how she looks herself up and down in the mirror, he follows her eyes and soon a huge smile appears on her face.

"You are right," she admits and although he's enjoyed their little game he's already smiling inside, because he thinks she'll finally admit the obvious, "We do make a really nice couple," she adds smiling and even though it isn't the answer he expected to hear he can't help doing the same.

They have been together for months, he just admitted to himself that night that there's nothing he wouldn't do for her. He doesn't even remember when was the last time he had a bowtie on and that is just one of the little things. And she's never forgotten to show that his efforts are indeed appreciated.

"You should wear a tie more often," she states playfully and he starts to chuckle.

"Thank you for reminding me why I can still hardly breathe," he replies, untying his tie quickly.

"I thought I'm the one taking your breath away," she says and grabs his untied tie to pull him closer for a kiss.

"This was indeed breathtaking," he admits and his lips move on to her cheek and her neck. He keeps kissing the part of her skin left uncovered by the fabric all the way down the neckline of the dress. It's something he's been longing for ever since he set eyes on her in that dress that night. Her hands dive into his hair and he hears her silent moan that just makes him even more passionate. His hands find their way under the tight material of the gown and start caressing her breasts slowly and he feels her hands move from his hair to his shoulders, obviously seeking support.

Keeping his hands on her bare skin, his lips move back to hers kiss by kiss, but before kissing her on the lips he has to say it out loud:

"I think it would be a crime to take this dress off you."

"Would it?" she asks teasing, quickly stealing a kiss from his lips, "Then let me commit a crime first," she chuckles slightly and starts unbuttoning his shirt.

"Setting a bad example, Miss Lockhart?" he teases as she tries to open his shirt, but his arms that are still linked with her upper body are in her way. After opening the cuff-links, she bends down a little and starts kissing his wrists, trying to force him to move his hands away, but he doesn't obey, so her hands grab his shirt and pull it out of his pants. After she opens the last buttons she reaches for his collar, throws his tie away and tries to take the shirt off him, but his hands are too comfortable resting under her dress, slightly stroking her breasts with his fingers. He shakes his head.

"I can't let you go first," he objects and leans forward to kiss her eagerly before he pulls his hands from under her dress and quickly moves behind her. He pulls her close to him, moves her hair aside and starts kissing her neck while his hands find their way back on her again, slipping to their hiding place under the deep neckline of her gown. She leans towards him, moaning slightly and turns her head backwards to look him in the eyes.

"Still not ready to commit a crime, huh?"

He glances in the mirror in front of them again and she follows his eyes, turning her head forward.

"A perfect couple," he says and his lips start kissing her neck again, while she apparently decides to put and end to their little game, because she closes the door to hide the mirror from them, then her hands move behind her back and reach for the button of his pants.

"So who's it gonna be, cowboy? You or me?" she asks turning her head in his direction again, keeping her fingers on the button.

He looks deep into her eyes for a short moment then kisses her with desire. Even though he can't see her in the mirror anymore, the image of them standing there together is still visible in his head. It would be a crime to take that dress off her, especially because he'll probably never see her in it again, but she is there in his arms, longing for his kisses, his touch and it's harder and harder to fight against his growing desire to have more of her.

"I can't let you go first," he repeats what he already said only a few minutes ago and slowly pulls his hands back, constantly touching her skin up to her neck, then his fingers grab the opener of her zipper and slowly pull it down. As her skin gets visible, he can't resist placing small kisses on her back and after he finishes with the zipper he slowly instructs her to turn around, to face him.

He looks her up and down again, admiring her in the gown for the last time and he can't hide this feeling from her. She leans forward to kiss him in return, without touching him and after the kiss ends he slowly pulls the dress down on her arms. He's tempted to start kissing her chest again, but he resists it and helps her out of her dress instead.

Holding the gown in his hands he leans forward to kiss her first then he decides to open the closet again and put it back on its place, which earns him a chuckle from her.

"The term white-collar crime has just gained a brand new meaning," she says still laughing and stands close behind him, her arms embracing his body and her hands making their way on his bare chest. He sees her face in the mirror again, her slightly messy hair and her faded makeup, but she is still beautiful to him. He turns his head towards her to kiss her and from that moment on he can't hold himself back anymore.

He closes the door with his feet and turns around in her arms to finally fully embrace her. He kisses her lips, her cheek, her neck, her chest and her whole body, not minding the undergarments slightly blocking his way. He knows he's moving too fast, he knows he's too eager to taste her everywhere, but he can't control himself anymore.

She steps backwards, probably losing balance and after his lips find back to hers he pushes her to the door of the closet. She doesn't seem to mind his behaviour, in fact she grabs his shirt again, forcing him to finally get rid of it and as soon as it lands on the ground her hands are already on his pants.

"You need to polish your style," he jabbers between two kisses, without giving her a chance to reply.

"Do I?" she asks gasping for air and he cuts her off with another kiss.

She quickly opens his pants and they fall onto the ground.

"Oops," she says playfully and he silences his rising laughter with another kiss, "Do you want…" she starts the next coming chance, but his lips don't even let her finish the sentence.

"Game over," he says as they part, he takes her into his arms and kissing her lips he carries her onto the bed.

o-o-o-o

As he hears her steps on the stairs, he quickly hides the paper under the couch and takes the other one into his hands, pretending to read it.

"Good morning," her voice sounds happy and he puts the paper down on the table to stand up and greet her.

She is wearing a light purple mini dress, with short sleeves and a straight neckline. If he didn't know her better he'd think she intentionally chose a dress without a low-neck, not to remind him of last night. Not that he needs a reminder or minds the absence of the neckline when he can observe her gorgeous legs. He's already spent months with her, still he has a hard time believing she's for real. He's never dared to ask her age, but she clearly looks much younger than that, even when she's not dressed up for a day out.

"Good morning," he says smiling and meets her halfway to kiss her softly, "I'm bringing you coffee," he adds after their lips part, being perfectly aware of what she needs first thing in the morning.

"Thank you," she replies and underlines it with a kiss, before she walks to the couch to sit down, her hands already reaching for the paper.

He quickly goes to the kitchen to pour her coffee, looking back at her a few times to check what she's is doing.

"Kurt?" he hears her voice, but he pretends not to listen. He slowly pours the coffee in the mug, puts sugar and cream in it and stirs it for a while, until he collects courage to go back to the other room.

"I called you," she says in a kind of reproachful way, putting down the paper and reaching for her coffee.

"You did? Sorry, I didn't hear," he lies, grabbing his mug and the paper.

"Why are you reading yesterday's paper?" she asks curiously and he quickly tries to come up with a reason.

"What? Yesterday's? I haven't even noticed," is the first reply that comes to his mind, but he has a feeling she can easily tell he's lying.

"Where's today's paper?" she requests, looking around and he has to think of a lie once more, while he already regrets not starting out with the truth on the first place. Maybe she wouldn't even have noticed the reason he hid the paper from her.

"I have no idea, I checked, but it wasn't in the mailbox," he replies, trying to sound casual and sits down, taking a sip from his coffee.

"It wasn't? That's unusual," she says, clearly doubting his words.

"Yep," he bows his head down and pretends to read the paper again, hoping she'll forget about all this and move on.

"You've already read yesterday's paper," she states and he doesn't know how she is so sure of that.

"I still want to read this…" he tries to explain, still hiding behind the paper, but she cuts her off.

"Are you hiding something from me?"

He shouldn't be surprised that she realised this and even though he knows it's no use denying it he still tries to keep up pretending just a little longer.

"Me? What could I possibly hide from you?"

He looks into her eyes again as he asks this and they both know there's really nothing he could hide from her and he doesn't even know anymore why he chose to hide that something that morning. Telling the truth would have been the easiest way out, but it is too late, he's already spent too much time trying to mislead her. He knows she'll forgive him for that, but he is still a bit worried about her reaction to that certain thing.

"There's something in the paper, right? Where is it?"

He sees it in her eyes that the game is over, even though she's let him try to fool her for a while, she wants the truth now and he has no choice but to give in if he wants her to easily forgive her later.

"It's…it's under the couch," he admits and she bends down to pull out the paper. It doesn't take much for her to find what he wanted to hide from her. He wasn't sure she'd really be angry about it, he just got confused as to how she'd react and decided to save it for later. He didn't want their morning to start with an argument or her getting pissed about this. Of course it could have resulted in her being happy as well. It just seemed unpredictable for him and postponing it looked like the best idea.

He observes her as she's looking at that certain page, with some pictures in the middle, one of which caused him a headache that morning, even though it is a really nice picture, showing a perfectly happy couple.

"And you wanted to hide this from me because…?" she asks, already smiling, and raises her eyes from the paper to look at him.

"I'm not sure, I just know how you feel about public display of affection," he tries to explain, but the more he thinks about it, the more silly his whole behaviour seems to him.

"Nice words cowboy, but really, what's wrong with this photo?"

It's obvious that she likes the photo, which makes him happy of course and now he wishes he didn't hide it from her so he could get out of explaining why he actually did it.

"Nothing, I really like it."

"Me too," she admits, still smiling and after placing the mug back on the table she stands up to walk over to him with the paper in her hand, "You though I would be angry?" she asks as she grabs the paper from his hand and throws it away, then puts his coffee mug next to hers on the table and sits down on his lap, putting the paper in hers so that the picture is visible.

"Yes, I mean not with me…and I wasn't sure…," he sees that she's not angry, so it's getting even harder to explain why he thought she would be.

"I kissed you, it's not your fault. Well, technically it is, but it was my decision. I wasn't drunk or anything, I knew what I was doing," she doesn't seem to mind at all that their most intimate moment from last night was captured like this.

"I know," he replies with a smile, it's surprising that she takes it so easily, but he can't help loving her even more for it.

"Then what's wrong? Yes, we are in the paper, today's paper, so it will be forgotten by tomorrow, except the people who do read yesterday's paper like you."

He starts to chuckle and she runs her hands through his hair then folds her arms around his neck.

"We make a really nice couple," she admits again and presses her lips against his, preventing him from saying anything. But he doesn't mind. He folds his arms around her, while an unusual thought comes to his mind. The thought that, even though just a little, he was actually able to change Diane Lockhart.


	6. Banished Memories

_Originally posted on 04/22/2011_

_Timeline: post 2x15_

_Song used: 'It's All Coming Back to Me' by Celine Dion_

* * *

><p><strong>Banished Memories<strong>

She didn't look around the room when they entered, she didn't want to check for familiar faces. She thought there might be people in there who knew her, but she didn't care. She wanted to have a night out, with a man she wished to get to know better, and she decided that he deserved her full attention on their second date, just like on the first. She didn't want to spend the night waving to familiar faces, and doing obligatory rounds of small talk.

She enjoyed their night together again as much as the first time. They spent the whole dinner talking. He was easy to talk to, and had an opinion on every subject that came up. She liked that he was smart and intelligent, and that they seemed to have the same values. The fact that he was good-looking too was a bonus. She was sure many women in the room would have wanted to switch places with her that night, but she didn't notice them either. She considered herself lucky that this man happened to cross her path, and if he kissed as well as he flirted, she wouldn't plan to let him go any time soon.

Their very first intimate moment happened when he carefully placed his hand on hers, and she wanted to smile in return, but it was interrupted by the noise of glass breaking to pieces on the floor near them. And it was an all too natural motion on her side to turn her head in that direction, just to look straight into a pair of all too familiar eyes.

She turned away from him immediately, but she felt her face burning already. She didn't want her date to notice her sudden change, so she quickly stood up, apologizing to him and left to the ladies room. She needed to be alone, just for a short while, to compose herself. She hadn't seen that man for a long time, and hadn't expected to see him ever again.

_There were nights when the wind was so cold  
>That my body froze in bed<br>If I just listened to it  
>Right outside the window<em>

_There were days when the sun was so cruel_  
><em>That all the tears turned to dust<em>  
><em>And I just knew my eyes were<em>  
><em>Drying up forever<em>

_I finished crying in the instant that you left_  
><em>And I can't remember where or when or how<em>  
><em>And I banished every memory you and I had ever made<em>

She wasn't sure how many nights and days had passed by since that day, because she did her best to forget about it and move on. She didn't want to think of him, because she didn't regret turning him down. She knew she made the right choice, she knew she wasn't meant to be his wife, because that would have required a sacrifice from her, that she hadn't been ready to take then, and most likely would never be. He asked too much from her, and left her after she'd rejected him.

She hadn't heard from him ever since, and she'd managed to erase his memory completely. It had been more than a year for sure, maybe even two since he'd left her office, almost making her cry with his last goodbye. She's never been the type to cry, but he did break her heart, and the wounds needed some time to heal. But she'd gotten over him, or at least that was what she'd thought until she saw him again a few minutes ago.

She knew that she had no other choice but to go back in there, and either convince her date that they should leave at once or stay and try to enjoy the rest of the night and ignore the other man. But the first option would have suggested that she'd left because of him, while she wasn't exactly feeling capable of doing the other either. The only thing she hoped for was that he'd be the first one to leave, so she decided to stay a few more minutes.

When she finally felt strong enough to open the door, she stepped outside, just to bump into the person she'd hoped would long be gone by then. She took another step, trying to pass by him without a word, but the next moment she felt his hand on her wrist, subtly pulling her back.

"We need to talk."

_But when you touch me like this  
>And you hold me like that<br>I just have to admit  
>That it's all coming back to me<em>

She didn't want to obey him, she wanted to pull her hand from his grab, and leave, but he didn't seem to want to let her go. She looked him in the eye, trying to tell him without words, that what he was doing wasn't right, but she'd gotten lost in those eyes too many times before, it was hard to resist them. She took a step back, hoping he'd let her hand go and looked around to see if anyone saw them. She was clearly feeling uncomfortable, and she knew that her date was waiting for her at their table.

"This is not the right place and time," she said and before she could say anything else, she felt him pulling her back in the room she'd just left. "Are you crazy? What are you doing?" she couldn't help raising her voice just a bit, but made sure not to attract the attention of anyone from the room at the end of the corridor.

"I want to talk to you," he said as he closed the door, letting her hand go, and turned the key in the lock.

"This is insane. Someone is waiting for me out there," she tried to stay as calm as she could, but the look on his face kind of frightened her. He seemed desperate.

"I saw you're having a lovely dinner, I bet he is the man of your dreams," he sounded sarcastic, which explained his somewhat wild behavior. She understood that he was jealous.

"You have no right to talk to me this way, and now please, let me go, I…" she couldn't finish the sentence because he interrupted her with a kiss. She wanted to pull back, she even wanted to slap him, but this urge disappeared as quickly as it came, and the next moment she found herself folding her arms around his neck, and kissing him back just as passionately.

_When I touch you like this  
>And I hold you like that<br>It's so hard to believe but  
>It's all coming back to me<em>

_There were moments of gold  
>And there were flashes of light<br>There were things I'd never do again  
>But then they'd always seemed right<br>There were nights of endless pleasure  
>It was more than any laws allow<br>Baby Baby_

It was only a kiss, but it brought back all the feelings she'd thought were buried forever. She'd never been able to resist him, only when they were apart. He made her do things she should have been ashamed of, but with him everything just felt right. From their first night, to the last kiss, it was all about him turning her world upside down. Turning Diane Lockhart, Chicago's respectable top litigator into a person she didn't recognize even herself. He made her drop all her values and she still couldn't say no to him. Not when he was looking in her eyes, holding her tight, kissing her with desire.

_If I kiss you like this  
>And if you whisper like that<br>It was lost long ago  
>But it's all coming back to me<br>If you want me like this  
>And if you need me like that<br>It was dead long ago  
>But it's all coming back to me<br>It's so hard to resist  
>And it's all coming back to me<br>I can barely recall  
>But it's all coming back to me now<br>But it's all coming back_

_Nooooo!_ She heard a voice screaming in her head, and she managed to escape from his arms, looking angrily at him.

"I…I'm sorry," he said softly, then turned around, and the next thing she knew she was standing alone in the room, facing the mirrors on the wall. She was ashamed to look at herself, she closed her eyes, and breathed in and out deeply. She knew she'd stayed away long enough to give her date a reason to worry, but she still needed time to think, she was confused.

He was the one leaving her, he was the one who didn't stay, who made her choose between him and her life. Her firm was her life, her career was her life, but she tried to fit him in, because he meant something to her. Of course it wasn't easy, and both of them got hurt many times along the way, and their relationship wasn't proven strong enough. And it was both their faults.

_There were those empty threats and hollow lies  
>And whenever you tried to hurt me<br>I just hurt you even worse  
>And so much deeper<em>

He'd forgiven her for putting her job before their relationship once, or at least it seemed like he had, but soon he disappeared for good, and only came back when he needed her help. And she tried to show him she understood, that she didn't hold the grudge, but he still wanted more. What she could offer to him, turned out to be not enough. And when he forced her to choose again, she hurt him again, and she thought that was their last chance.

_There were hours that just went on for days  
>When alone at last we'd count up all the chances<br>That were lost to us forever_

_But you were history with the slamming of the door  
>And I made myself so strong again somehow<br>And I never wasted any of my time on you since then_

She didn't expect to see him ever again, she thought he'd quit his job and left to start a new life. She even thought he'd already found someone else. He was a real charmer, a perfect gentleman, he was good looking. She didn't know anything about his past, but she was sure he hadn't been single for too long.

She realized she hadn't even seen who he was with that night, and the thought that he could have been there with another woman gave her the strength she needed to compose herself. She quickly fixed her make-up, and hurried back to the room.

When she glanced in the direction of his table she wasn't surprised to see that she'd been right. He was in fact sitting there with another woman, a woman who was clearly younger and prettier than her. That was all she needed to see to get rid of all her confusion, gain strength and approach her table, taking her eyes off the other. She hated him in that moment, she hated what he'd just done to her, and for once and for all she wished to forget about him.

She apologized to her date for her absence, and tried to act as naturally as she could, as if nothing had happened. The other was just playing with her, because she let him. But this was the last time, she will leave this place with her date, and will forget the other like she'd done before. She won't be alone, and she won't waste any thoughts on him ever again.

She glanced in the direction of the other table once more, just to find him looking in her direction. She turned her head away and smiled at her date, placed her hand on his, and was determined to enjoy the night as she'd done before, ignoring the other person, just like everyone else in the room, except her date.

o-o-o-o-o-o

He walked her up to her doorstep and kissed her goodbye. Their first kiss convinced her that he was a keeper and let herself in her home with a smile on her face, while he left. She wasn't ready to let him in, and he didn't seem to mind. She wanted to take things slowly and it looked like that he felt the same way. They were enjoying each other's company, and they had no reason to rush things.

The sound of the doorbell proved her wrong, but she still opened the door again, with the same smile on her face, that faded away in an instant when she saw the unexpected visitor standing in front of her. She felt like slamming the door in his face, telling him to go to hell.

"We need to talk," he said softly and didn't move.

"I don't think we have anything to talk about, and if you make another move on me like the last one, I swear I'll…"

"I won't. I'm sorry," he cut in showing up both his hands as a gesture of peace. "May I come in?"

"Why? What's the point? Why don't you just go away?" she asked silently.

"Diane, please."

"Fine, come in," she surrendered, because she didn't want her neighbors to become curious about a man standing in her doorway, and it looked like she couldn't get rid of him as easily as she wished, and she didn't want to make a scene out in the open.

He stepped inside, and she closed the door behind him. She showed him in the direction of the living room and when he didn't move she walked past him towards the room, and sat down in an armchair.

"I won't offer you a drink, because I'm sure both of us have had enough tonight. So just tell me what you want."

"You," he said simply and sat down on the couch in front of her.

"Me?" she asked and she couldn't help the short chuckle that escaped from her lips. "What about your date? Where did you leave her?"

"My date?" he asked, and looked surprised. "What are you talking about?"

"The cute red-head you dined with tonight."

"It was a business dinner, what made you think it was a date?"

She assumed he was on a date, but of course she didn't bother to observe them, the fact that he was with another woman, was enough of a proof for her.

"It doesn't matter. I was on a date, and what you did was so wrong on so many levels."

"I know, I shouldn't have, I'm sorry. I just didn't expect to see you…with another man."

"I'm trying to live my life. You were the one who left. How long do you think I should have grieved over you? Not that I did it at all. That's just not me."

She wasn't all honest of course. There were nights when she couldn't help missing him, wishing he'd never left. But those nights were long over, and she moved on. Or at least that was what she'd thought before he kissed her again that night, and managed to make her jealous right afterwards. It was a clear sign, that she still had feelings for him, however hard she kept on denying that.

"I've been meaning to call you for a while."

"You have? And what stopped you?"

"You were the one who rejected me."

"Because you asked me something impossible."

"I just wanted to be with you."

"I wanted to be with you too, but leaving my firm would have been too much of a price to pay."

"I realized that…but it was too late."

"It is too late."

"I'm sorry. I just wanted to apologize for my behavior tonight. It won't happen again."

"You can't just walk in and out of my life like this."

"I know, this was the last time. Next time I see you having dinner with another man, I promise not to break a glass again."

He broke that glass because he was jealous, otherwise she might have never noticed him being there, just a few tables away from her. At first she thought it was crazy, but when she saw him with the other woman she couldn't help feeling the same way. She was okay with thinking he might have moved on, but to actually see him with someone else was different. It kind of justified all his previous actions in her eyes, but she wasn't sure what he wanted to achieve with them.

"What do you expect from me?"

"Nothing. I'd better go."

He stood up and she did too, and when he wanted to turn away she reached for his arm to stop him.

"Kurt."

He turned back to her with a questioning look in his eyes.

"I know you weren't thinking when you broke that glass, and when you followed me. Now please, take a moment to think, and tell me what was all this about. I thought that you and I were over."

"That was what I thought too," he admitted, and took her hand in his. "But we both made mistakes. Don't you think that we deserve another chance?"

She looked him in the eye, and she saw that he was serious. He was right, they both had made mistakes before, but none of those were irreparable. And if he was willing to try it again with her, she would be a fool to reject him again. She stroke his face softly with her other hand, and he reached out to take that hand too, then pulled her towards to him.

He bent closer to her, their faces being only a few inches away, and waited.

"I do," she said finally, and nodded smiling at him, and he took it as a permission to kiss her. It was nothing like the other kiss that night. The other one was demanding, reminded her of the way he kissed her after questioning him in court during his trial. But this one reminded her of their very first kiss.

_But if I touch you like this  
>And if you kiss me like that<br>It was so long ago  
>But it's all coming back to me<br>If you touch me like this  
>And if I kiss you like that<br>It was gone with the wind  
>But it's all coming back to me<em>

_There were moments of gold  
>And there were flashes of light<br>There were things we'd never do again  
>But then they'd always seemed right<br>There were nights of endless pleasure  
>It was more than all your laws allow<br>Baby, Baby, Baby_

_When you touch me like this_  
><em>And when you hold me like that<em>  
><em>It was gone with the wind<em>  
><em>But it's all coming back to me<em>  
><em>When you see me like this<em>  
><em>And when I see you like that<em>  
><em>Then we see what we want to see<em>  
><em>All coming back to me<em>  
><em>The flesh and the fantasies<em>  
><em>All coming back to me<em>  
><em>I can barely recall<em>  
><em>But it's all coming back to me now<em>

"We both have been acting so foolishly tonight," he said chuckling still holding her close.

"I know, but it's all your fault."

"I blame you," he replied and placed a small kiss on her lips.

"Me?"

"Because you look gorgeous," he whispered in her ear and she chuckled. "Mind if I stay the night?"

"Why? You wanted to leave again?"

"No," he replied quickly. "I won't leave until you tell me to."

"Then you are not going anywhere," she whispered against his lips.

_If you forgive me all this  
>If I forgive you all that<br>We forgive and forget  
>And it's all coming back to me<br>When you see me like this  
>And when I see you like that<br>We see just what we want to see  
>All coming back to me<br>The flesh and the fantasies  
>All coming back to me<br>I can barely recall but it's all coming back to me now_


	7. The Ways It Started

_Originally posted on 09/11/2011_

_Song used: 'If Walls Could Talk' by Celine Dion_

* * *

><p><strong>The ways it started<strong>

It started with a kiss.

A kiss that charmed her but confused her at the same time. It was sweet, patient and irresistible. A kiss he gave her, because he found it easier to kiss her, than to talk to her. _"You know there's a selfishness to the silence of the cowboy, forcing everybody else to carry the weight of the conversation."_ Or maybe he just intended to make it clear that he wanted more than just talk to her. It was their very first date, but they were both adults. It was clear to them what their attraction was about and with that kiss he made sure there wouldn't be any misunderstandings.

He wanted her and even though she tried to escape from him afterwards, she found herself kissing him again. And after another try, when she actually managed to make it outside the room, away from him, it didn't take long for her to find back to him. It was a desire that had to be fulfilled, because it couldn't have been stopped in any other way.

They were both experienced lovers and whatever political differences they'd had at the dinner table, it simply didn't show behind those closed doors, where they were alone, where no words were needed. They let their desires take over, forgetting about time and space. For a short while she ceased to be the classy liberal lady, and him the honest republican cowboy. They were just a woman and a man, who both knew what they wanted, the other.

_Two people making memories_  
><em>Just too good to tell<em>  
><em>These arms are never empty<em>  
><em>When we're lying where we fell<em>

But this night soon became just a memory, along with a few others that followed. The affair didn't last long and it faded away with each passing day that they spent apart. But the recollection was with them again the next time they saw each other, just like the desire that couldn't be suppressed. And when they were alone again, behind closed doors, far from stranger eyes, it didn't matter any more whose fault it had been that they had been apart, they just wanted to be together.

_We're two shadows  
>Chasing rainbows<br>Behind closed windows  
>Behind closed doors<em>

They weren't strangers any more, they had a common past with intimate moments like that. Maybe they didn't fit on some levels, but on this level they were in perfect unity. It was awkward from the moment they met again, but only until their lips finally found each other and reminded the other what they'd been missing during the long time they'd spent apart. There were no questions or answers. There were just kisses, touches, sighs and screams. Nobody saw them, nobody heard them. There was no way anyone could have gotten to know their secret.

_These walls keep a secret_  
><em>That only we know<em>  
><em>But how long can they keep it?<em>  
><em>'Cause we're two lovers, we lose control<em>

It had already happened once, right after their first time that what they'd thought had been their secret became a target of others. They knew they couldn't have let that happen again, but they almost did. They could have gotten caught, they were careless, but it just felt good not to care. Someone could have come in, someone who wouldn't have bothered knocking before. But she sent away the one who did, and sank back to those arms again, that held her tighter than ever.

_If walls could talk  
>Oooh...they would say I want you more<br>They would say  
>Hey...ever feel like this before?<br>That you will always be the one for me_

It was the passion that brought them back together, that made them forgive and forget. But behind the surface there was a different kind of feeling. It had been growing secretly inside of them right from the beginning.

It started with a smile.

A smile that charmed him but confused him at the same time. A smile that was sweet, glorious and irresistible. A smile she presented him with to tease him. _"Oh my goodness, you're like something out of Melville."_ Or maybe she was already letting him see through her usual façade from the very first moment. It was the first time they met, and it was a business meeting, but they both knew right from the start that it was more than that. Beside the mutual attraction, there was a mutual sympathy, they made each other smile, they made each other laugh. And without noticing it, they started falling in love with each other with the first mutual smile.

He was the one who realized his true feelings first and it led him to propose to her leaving her with a difficult decision. She'd been there, she'd lost him once, but it was harder to lose him again, because this time he asked her to go with him and she said no. She couldn't regret saying no, but the minute he turned away from her, she felt that she wasn't ready to let him go that easily. She needed a last touch, she needed a last kiss to ease the pain. She started missing him the minute she let go of him and after he disappeared from her eyes, she began to wonder if she'd done the right thing letting him go.

It wasn't over yet. It couldn't have been over, because there were feelings already. It started out as an affair, but sometime during those lonely nights after he'd left again, she discovered her feelings for him. Feelings she couldn't hide any more, that haunted her each night. She wasn't used to missing someone from her side, until she had to learn how to deal with _his _absence.

He came back eventually. Part of his life was there, he couldn't have stayed away forever. And they only needed to see each other again once to realize what both of them had been missing. They'd tried being apart, they'd tried it twice, but they couldn't forget. And they finally decided to really try it together. They already had something to build their relationship on, there was the passion and there were those feelings. They just needed to listen to that common voice that came to them so naturally in those secret moments.

And after they finally talked everything through and made those decisions together that had to be made, it was all too natural for them to get lost in each other's arms again. But this time it was different. This time it wasn't just a few moments of pleasure with no tomorrow. They didn't have to rush things, to be eager. They knew they had all the time in the world.

_We're painting pictures  
>Making magic<br>Taking chances  
>Making love<em>

And at a certain point they finally said those magical three words that they'd been hiding from each other.

_If walls had eyes  
>My...they would see the love inside<br>They would see  
>Me...in your arms in ecstasy<br>And with every move they'd know I love you so_

They both knew it wasn't easy to find love in this world, especially not in those stages of their lives. It had been love from the very first smile, and they knew it was a love they shouldn't have let go.


	8. The Right Place and Time

Originally posted on 07/31/2011

* * *

><p><strong>The right place and time<strong>

He was beginning to wonder if there was something wrong with the food, because she was taking the smallest possible bites, and didn't say a word. It wasn't only that she didn't comment on the meal, which had never happened before. She has become his biggest critic, always finding even the tiniest of his mistakes, and never missing to point them out. Of course she did all this in the sweetest manner ever, making sure he wouldn't get offended, and that whatever problem she had with the meal, she never left anything on her plate that he'd cooked for her. And even though it didn't work all the way round, because she wouldn't let him find any fault in her creations, he didn't mind those remarks, he loved hearing her talk.

But that evening she not only forgot to criticise or praise his efforts in the kitchen, she didn't say anything else either. And this silence was starting to get unbearable for him, especially because he had no idea what had caused it.

About an hour ago he sent her out of his kitchen, told her she should rest while he prepared dinner for them, and she didn't protest. It was Friday night, and both of them had been through a tiring week. They'd planned to spend their weekend at his farm, and he'd been looking forward to it as always. But this wasn't how he'd imagined their first night.

She didn't seem angry, as a matter of fact in the corner of her eyes he claimed to have seen a hidden smile. And he had no idea what she could have been angry about anyway. She hadn't behaved like this on the way there. She had been chatty as usual, telling him anecdotes about her week. Something must have happened later, while he was preparing their dinner. And he was dying to know the answer.

He looked at her again, smiling a little, and realised he'd been too busy figuring out what could have been on her mind. He forgot to do the most natural thing, to ask her about it.

"You're not hungry tonight?"

"I'm eating."

"I can see that," he sighed. He obviously lost the first round, starting with the wrong question, but he didn't plan to give up that easily.

"Is there something wrong…with the food?" he added, because he knew she preferred not to discuss too personal questions at the dinner table, but her silence started to make him crazy.

"No, the food is fine."

_Fine?_ If there was one adjective she'd never used to describe his meals it was this. He was slowly starting to loose his patience.

"Good…that it's fine I mean…I mean…oh for god's sake don't do this to me!" he said nervously, when he noticed the hidden smile again in her eyes that threatened to burst out.

"What am I doing?" she asked innocently and her smile was getting more and more obvious.

"Talk to me, this silence is just…I know something's happened, tell me what's happened!"

"You really want to know?"

"Yes!" he said a bit louder with relief.

"Are you sure you want to know _now_?"

"Why wait?"

"I thought we probably shouldn't talk about this during dinner."

"So you decided we wouldn't talk at all?"

"We are talking now."

"So do you want to continue with this, or could we finally get to what you've been trying to hide from me?"

"But apparently I failed."

"You've given yourself away."

"I think we should leave it for after dinner."

He knew he couldn't protest that, he respected those decisions of hers.

"On one condition. You tell me what you think of the food. And don't say it's fine because…"

"It could have used more pepper, but I love how crispy it is."

He leaned forward and kissed her. Whatever it was that she was hiding from him, she managed to make up for it in one sentence.

o-o-o-o

"You really have bought it," she said as they were taking a seat on the couch in the living room.

She knew he wouldn't have brought up the subject again, so she had to start on her own. In fact she'd been looking forward to mentioning what had been on her mind ever since she'd found that something in his room, but she also knew that the dinner table wasn't the best place to discuss politics.

But she couldn't get the question and the victorious smile out of her head, she'd tried to hide it from him, but he knew her too well. It was even scary at times, but she loved him for that at others. And she particularly loved him that night, when she found the book on one of his shelves.

It wasn't just a flirtation after all. He said he'd bought it, and it was true. He even kept it on one of his shelves, where people might have seen it. It was a miracle she hadn't discovered it earlier herself. He kept it next to the book she'd given him. He kept that book on the self too, where anyone could have seen it. He kept those two books there, and she'd found them that night, and she loved him even more for that.

She knew they might have ended up having a political argument if she'd brought this up. And she didn't want that to happen at the dinner table. It was something she'd insisted on ever since their first date. Just like she preferred not to discuss too personal questions either. Everything had the right place and time, and that was the right place and time to talk about that particular question she'd been hiding from him that evening.

"Bought what?"

"The Hilary bio."

He chuckled, she'd obviously surprised him.

"I have."

"Have you read it?"

"Are there letters in it?"

She chuckled, she knew that as long as he was joking they were fine. She didn't really want this to end badly, but it'd been a while since they'd actually talked about politics. She didn't want to provoke him, but she couldn't keep her find to herself, it had been hard enough keeping it from him for the time of the dinner.

"Yes. I have read the Palin bio you'd sent me, you know."

"Really? I have read yours too," he chuckled again and she did the same, but the next moment she decided to turn to a serious tone.

"Are we going to avoid this topic forever?"

"I don't know, what do you think?"

"I love arguing."

"_That_ I know."

"I love arguing with you."

"I know that too well."

"I'm serious about these values, and I know that you are too. I just want you to know that I'm serious about us too."

The minute she saw the Hilary bio on his shelf, was the minute she knew what they'd started could last, and she just wanted to make sure he felt the same way. She wanted to make sure they wouldn't end up cutting each other's throat on a political question. She didn't mind the teasing, she didn't mind him making fun of her or her values, but she didn't want to take the risk of anything more.

"I'm serious about us too," he said softly and kissed her. "Otherwise why would I bother cooking for you all the time?" he added playfully.

"Because you love being criticised by me?"

"I do, but I prefer something else," he replied, and his kiss kept her from asking any more questions.


	9. The Right Choice

_Originally posted on 07/24/2011_

_**Note:** Silver Bullet was far from being perfect. I love the episode, but it left us with too many questions, a proposal that was really sweet but shouldn't have happened and a goodbye that was wonderful, but heartbreaking as well. So one day I decided to get rid of everything that happened in SB and write my own version of Kurt's comeback, staying in canon with the "You should have called me" line._

_The story has two timelines, the past timeline is distinguished with italic type. But both happened on the same day._

* * *

><p><strong>The right choice<strong>

She could have been surprised to see him at her door, but she wasn't. Not after what had happened that afternoon.

He didn't say anything and she didn't ask why he'd come either. She let him in without a word.

* * *

><p><em>It was bound to happen some day. He knew he couldn't have avoided her forever. He hadn't exactly been hiding from her, but he had still been trying to forget her. Until he met her again, accidentally, after several months. <em>

* * *

><p>There was still silence among them as they were sitting opposite each other in her living room.<p>

_He_ had to start the conversation and she didn't feel like making it easier for him.

* * *

><p><em>She was as beautiful as ever, he couldn't take his eyes off her. And he knew right away that he'd made a mistake.<em>

_There was a small chance she hadn't seen him. She was engaged in a conversation, and he still could have turned around and gone without looking back, without her noticing him._

* * *

><p>"I wasn't sure I should have come," he started, focusing on the ground.<p>

She wished he looked into her eyes, but she understood that he was feeling uncomfortable.

"But after seeing you today, I felt like I owe you this."

She wanted to reply that he didn't owe her anything, but it would have been a lie.

* * *

><p><em>But before he could consider the consequences, their eyes met, and he had no choice any more. <em>

_She froze, and for a long moment neither of them moved. He was the one who broke it first. His eyes moved away from hers. He was already feeling guilty._

* * *

><p>"I know it's been too long," he continued, "and I know I'm the one who hasn't called."<p>

It's been several months, since he'd left to take a case in Florida, and she hadn't heard from him ever since.

"You have every right to be angry with me," he finally took the courage to look into her eyes.

"I'm not angry with you," she replied in all honesty, finally breaking her silence, "I just thought you were different, someone who keeps his word."

He lowered his eyes, he was obviously feeling the guilt.

* * *

><p><em>She turned to her companion again, but her eyes kept finding back to his, as if she had been waiting for something. He wanted to do the right thing, he just wasn't sure what would have been the right thing to do. <em>

* * *

><p>"I'm sorry," he said, facing her again, "I've never meant to hurt you."<p>

He did hurt her, but she wouldn't have admitted it for anything.

"There's no need for this, really. I appreciate that you've come, but I don't think we have much left to talk about."

* * *

><p><em>He caught her look again, and opened his mouth, as if he wanted to say something, but the words didn't come. He bowed his head down instead. What could he have said after such a long time? <em>

_He didn't turn around, he walked past her without a word, and quickly left the building. He only realised outside that he had done the worst possible thing._

* * *

><p>"I want to make things right, Diane."<p>

"Why? You've already made your choice, when you stayed away."

"Because now I know that was the wrong choice."

"And what makes you think you have another chance?"

"I saw something in your eyes today."

* * *

><p><em>He wanted to go back and make it right, but there was no way back. He just made everything worse with this move, as if he hadn't messed it up enough before. He had never been such a coward, but she brought out the worst of him. Or maybe it was his conscience.<em>

* * *

><p>"It doesn't matter what you think you saw, it's over, I've moved on."<p>

"I see," he said silently, "then it was the right choice after all."

"It was _your_ choice."

"I know," he said, then after a short pause he added, "except…I told you I had feelings for you."

"And you proved them by going away and not coming back? Is it how you show someone that you care?"

"And how do you show someone that you care?"

* * *

><p><em>They had been involved a while ago and he'd even developed feelings for her, feelings she hadn't returned, feelings he still seemed to have. And they acted like two strangers just a moment ago, and it was his fault. He thought he had made the right decision, cutting her out of his life. He thought it would have been the best for both of them.<em>

* * *

><p>This question caught her off guard. She looked straight into his eyes, while trying to find the words to say. She was wondering if she really hadn't shown her feelings, she thought she had. She hadn't been sure about those feelings, but she'd let him close to her, despite all their differences, she'd surrendered to him, she'd almost fallen in love with him, and his disappearance had made her suffer.<p>

"I thought you'd known me better," she said honestly, bowing her head down.

* * *

><p><em>But seeing her that day made him realise it certainly hadn't been the best for him. Suddenly all those lonely months just didn't feel right, months he could have spent with her. Maybe it was too late already, but he felt as if he'd been given another chance with this unexpected encounter. He wanted to know if it was too late to make things right.<em>

* * *

><p>"Then give me another chance, I want to get to know you better, I want to feel that this relationship means as much to you as it means to me."<p>

"There's no relationship."

"Let it be, let us make up for the lost time, give us another chance!"

He was still sitting, didn't move closer to her, but his words flooded all her thoughts. She wasn't able to think properly any more, she felt like losing her resistance second by second.

* * *

><p><em>Maybe she'd already moved on, it's been too long, but he suddenly felt the urge to make up for not calling her, even if it had been too late. He couldn't have walked away now as if nothing had happened that day.<em>

* * *

><p>"I can't, I'm sorry," she said consequently, but her own words surprised herself as well. She was tempted to say yes, she was tempted to give in.<p>

"Then I have to go," he said standing up, and his words frightened her. She knew it was her last chance, their last chance. She knew she could only blame herself if she let him go. He'd stayed away, because he'd thought she hadn't cared, and he was about to go away again for the same reason. She'd spent so much time wondering why, but this answer had never occurred to her.

* * *

><p><em>He saw the interest in her eyes, but the blame as well. The former gave him hope, while the latter frightened him. But he was determined already, determined to talk to her, because finally he felt that he was planning to do something right. And even if she'd sent him away, he would have taken comfort in that at least he'd tried. <em>

* * *

><p>"I did care, I do care," she said suddenly, standing up as well, and apparently this was all he needed to hear, because the next moment she found herself in his arms.<p>

And she knew right away that they had finally made the right choice.


	10. Payback's a Biatch

_Originally posted on 02/20/2011_

* * *

><p><strong>Payback's a biatch<br>**

"I had an interesting call today," she said looking up from her paper.

He was washing the dishes, while she was going through a brief at the kitchen table, but she couldn't concentrate on the paper. She'd been thinking of how to bring up the subject ever since she got home, and couldn't resist herself any more.

"From who?" he asked turning his head backwards to look at her.

"It is more interesting what she said," she replied taking off her glasses.

"So it was a woman…and what did she say?"

"She told me to keep an eye on you."

"What?" Kurt asked surprised, then turned off the tap, wiped his hands and turned around to face her.

"Ever heard the name Viola Walsh?"

"I have."

"You have?"

Diane was surprised, just like when Viola called her earlier that day and mentioned Kurt's name. She never thought these two had ever heard of each other, and she was kind of hoping Viola was bluffing when she warned her about him. But it looked like she wasn't.

"Yep."

"How?"

"What do you mean how?"

"How do you know her?"

"I can't talk about ongoing cases with you."

"You know her through an ongoing case? You've met her?"

"I have. But why are you so nervous?"

Diane didn't even realize that she was nervous, she was too busy putting the pieces together. Viola told her she was in town, Kurt mentioned an ongoing case. Despite the lack of information, she thought she managed to figure out what could be going on. Viola must have hired Kurt for a case, him of all the experts, she was sure it was intentional on her side.

"Because I didn't know you two knew each other."

"And I didn't know you two knew each other either."

"She never mentioned me?"

"Should she have?"

"I don't know. I just got this call from her saying she's in Chicago, and that it's payback time and that I should keep an eye on you," _Viola is a bitch_, she thought as she was starting to realize what was going on. She warned her to keep an eye on him, she wanted to make her jealous.

"Payback time?"

"She thinks I wanted to steal a client from her."

"You what?"

"It happened a month ago. We won the case for her and she wasn't even grateful," She never mentioned that incident to Kurt, she knew how he'd have reacted.

"And she wants to pay you back through me?"

"Apparently," she had to admit, that she hadn't expected anything like that, a payback yes, but nothing like that. _Viola is a bitch, _she said to herself again.

"And that makes you nervous because?"

"Because she lost millions, and she blames me. She yelled at me in my own office calling me names," She was surprised that it felt kind of good finally telling this to him.

"What names?"

"That's not the point, and why are you smiling? Do you find it funny that someone called me names?"

He was smiling, and she had no idea why. This was the only reaction she didn't expect.

"You are jealous."

_Looks like the bitch succeeded_, she thought but she tried to deny it. "Of her? No way!" she replied, but she already felt her cheeks starting to burn.

"You are, don't deny it."

"I just wanted to warn you," she said finally, trying to change the subject, when she realized maybe Viola didn't expect that from her. Maybe she thought she wouldn't tell Kurt, just to test him, but somehow she never thought of not telling him. Why would she need to test him? She trusted him completely, but she didn't trust Viola, and the image of those two together made her…jealous, that was the right word.

"Warn me?"

"Of her."

"Of her? She seemed pretty harmless to me."

Diane could imagine Viola playing nice to Kurt, trying to show him her best side, and that thought made her shiver.

"Maybe she is waiting for the right moment."

"For what?"

"For, I don't know, seducing you?" Viola was capable of that, it must have been her only reason to put up this whole act.

"Seducing me?" he asked and started to laugh.

"Yep, looks like she wants to hurt me that badly."

"You are adorable when you are jealous," he leaned closer to her and kissed her softly.

"I am serious, Kurt."

"You know what, come to my farm tomorrow, I'm meeting the _vicious Viola_ there," he grinned.

"You're meeting her in your barn?"

"Yep, I'm showing her an experiment."

"In your barn?"

"Yep."

"Right there, where you said you had feelings for me?"

"Still not jealous?" he asked with a grin.

"A little," she admitted, and she felt she was blushing again.

"So are you coming?"

"To spy on you?"

"If you want to."

"I don't trust her."

"Then come."

"I don't know…"

"Then think about it, and while you are thinking, let me show you that you have nothing to worry about."

He kissed her again, this time with real passion, and after a few seconds she completely forgot about Viola.

o-o-o-o-o

"I'm going with you," she said at the breakfast table the next morning.

He looked at her for a few seconds before he replied.

"You want to hide in the hay in these clothes?"

Diane burst out in laughter, and couldn't stop it for quite a while.

"Who said anything about hiding in the hay?"

"I thought you wanted to spy on us," he grinned.

"I most certainly won't hide in hay in order to do that," she was still half laughing. "Not in these clothes anyway."

"So what is the plan?"

"I'm not sharing."

"You are not sharing the plan?"

"I don't want you to jeopardize it."

"Wouldn't it help if I knew?"

"No, I want you to act naturally, so she wouldn't suspect anything."

"You think I can't act?"

"Not like me cowboy, with decades of courtroom training behind me."

"Fair," he grinned. "So, am I supposed to let her seduce me or not?"

"Not while I'm still breathing," she said with a half smile.

"That was all I wanted to know," he replied, and leaned across the table to kiss her.

o-o-o-o

Their kissing was interrupted by the bell. She got up from his lap, then quickly grabbed her bag, searched for a mirror and her lipstick, while he went to open the door after placing another kiss on her neck as he passed by her.

By the time Viola entered the door, she was sitting in the seat opposite his desk, trying to look professional.

"Diane?" there was a clear surprise in Viola's voice.

"Viola," she said with a smile, and tried to sound surprised too.

"What are you doing here?"

"Mr. McVeigh is our firm's adviser. But what are _you _doing here? I thought you enjoyed the weather in L.A."

"I do," she said with a smile. "But when work calls."

"I'm sorry, Mr. McVeigh," Diane said, and stood up, looking at Kurt, who had been standing there silently watching the two women. "I think I stayed longer than I should have, I'll call you about the result," she said and stood up.

"I'll have it by tomorrow," he replied.

"It was nice seeing you again, Viola," said Diane, showing the woman her seat, then walked towards the door, and he followed her.

"You are not staying?" he asked, silently, standing in the open door, facing Diane who was already outside, showing his back to the other woman.

"I trust you," she replied, just as silently, putting her pointing finger on his lips with a smile, then left.

Her plan was to show Viola that she didn't care about her threats, she was able to leave the two alone without the tiniest bit of distress. Viola was obviously putting up an act in front of Kurt, and she decided to play along, let the bitch think she didn't care about what she was planning.

o-o-o-o

She was home early that evening, waiting for him to arrive. She trusted him, but she was dying to know what happened in the barn. She didn't get a call from Viola that day, although she'd kind of expected to.

She was sitting on her bed, surrounded by papers when she heard his steps on the stairs.

"Hey," he greeted her with a smile from the door.

"Hey," she looked up, she had her glasses on. He once told her he found her red glasses sexy. "I see you've managed to escape from the arms of _vicious Viola_," she said, grinning.

"Did you say you used to be friends?" he asked stepping closer to her.

"Well, we've never been too close, why?"

"Because she is absolutely unendurable," he said, and he sounded kind of exhausted.

"Really? I thought you said she was_ pretty harmless_," she was grinning even more.

"That was before."

"Before?"

"Before you decided to show her your claws."

"My what? She started this whole thing," she was trying to defend herself, although she kind of knew it was unnecessary.

"But I was the suffering part," he said sitting down opposite to her on the bed, and he pushed some papers away from between them. Diane looked at him with a questioning eye, so he continued. "I didn't mind her manners before, but now that I knew it was an act, it suddenly became unbearable to me."

"Poor thing," Diane replied with a sympathetic smile.

"She tried to use every chance to touch me, to lean close to me. At some point I even thought she was about to jump in my arms," he was shivering, and Diane couldn't have been happier.

"But she didn't?"

"I made it clear that I wasn't interested. You know how persuasive you can be with a gun in your hand?"

Diane started to laugh, but then she saw that he was still under a kind of shock, so she stopped.

"You were suffering?" she asked with a teasing smile.

"I was," he replied and reached out to take her glasses off.

"How can I help you forget it?" she asked leaning close to him, her lips almost touching his.

"I'm sure you'll figure it out," he replied before kissing her.

o-o-o-o

"You dared to steal my expert witness?" Diane couldn't believe her ears, and when she looked up Viola was already standing in front of her desk.

"I did what?"

"He quit."

"Who?"

"Don't play the innocent Diane, you know exactly who I am talking about. You're lover."

"My what?" Diane was enjoying the whole situation, but she was only smiling in the inside. Kurt told her he quit the job, because the experiment proved Viola's client was guilty. She was kind of expecting Viola blaming that on her as well, and she decided to find it amusing.

"_Mr. McVeigh is our firm's adviser_, my ass," the other woman was clearly angry. "You jeopardized my case."

"You jeopardized your case yourself," she said still calmly. "And don't bother to use the b* word again, I am immune to that."

Viola clearly wanted to say something else, it looked like her head wanted to explode, and Diane found it amusing, although she still didn't show it. She looked the other woman deep in the eye, until the brunette finally turned around and left her office.

Diane reached for her cell phone, and started to type.

"_Ding-dong! The __b__witch is dead .:D"_


End file.
